terrifying your own child into submission makes you an abuser.
watching your child cry and screaming at them to stop and invalidating their pain and reasons for crying makes you an abuser.
staring at your child in disgust and contempt after they displease you makes you an abuser.
threatening to your child to take away their basic resources if they don’t give you exactly what you want makes you an abuser.
forcing your child to feel ashamed for not living up to your ideals makes you an abuser.
using slurs, hateful names and insults on your own child without any regard to what it does to their mental health makes you an abuser.
forcing your child to chase impossible expectations and making them feel like they’re worthless for not achieving them makes you an abuser.
acting like your child is a burden and a waste of space and blaming their illness/disability/depression on it makes you an abuser.
behaving like your child will never amount to anything and isn’t worth any resources and nurturing makes you an abuser.
making your child feel like they’re never good enough makes you an abuser.
if your child’s heart is hurting because they know no matter what they do and how hard they try they will always be a failure in your eyes, you are an abuser.
if your child can’t look at themselves without self hatred because they had to look at themselves from your perspective and all they saw is disgust and hatred, you’re an abuser.
If your child is struggling to believe they have the right to live and to be cared and loved, if they can’t stop hearing your hateful voice putting them down and using their every action to prove they’re worthless, you’re an abuser.
If you watched your child in pain and assured them they deserved it, you’re an abuser.
If your child can’t love themselves from how badly you hated them, you’re an abuser.
An interesting one from my own experience:
Convincing your child they will fail at anything they try, or that they’ll die young, because you used scare tactics like “do you want to end up a loser because you didn’t do (X)?” or “just wait until you get (disease) because you didn’t listen to me!” as a way to ‘motivate’ them makes you an abuser.
Using any form of negative reinforcement or feedback so recklessly and severely that your child internalizes all the negativity you throw at them makes you an abuser.
An inability to help or motivate your child into good behaviors without traumatizing threats, however indirect – and, likewise, a refusal to assess why your child may be engaging in bad behaviors – makes you an abuser.
Time for some kitchen charts to help you adult better 😉
Cause I know a lot of my followers get stuck on some of these.
Reblogging because charts like these are always useful, especially when trying to convert between US Cups (volume measure) and oz / gr (weight measure).
Not having grown up with them, cups have always seemed an inaccurate way to measure anything coarse: liquids, flour, sugar, no probs, but surely 1 cup of (say) whole almonds is going to be a smaller amount than 1 cup of ground almonds, because of the air spaces.
And then there’s the “pint’s a pound the world around” business… Imperial pints are bigger, 20 fl.oz rather than 16.
@dduane has a set of US Cups, and just for fun we also got a set of these amusing spoons. What I really want are measures for Some, A Bit and most important, Far Too Much.
Um, cilantro and coriander are the same thing? Why do they have two different rows for the same thing in the spice/herb table?
When it’s “cilantro” they’re usually talking about the leafy part of the plant, and when it’s “coriander” they mean the seeds.
Apply to a job, wait (1) day, then call. Give them your first and last name. Tell them you submitted an application and that you’re very motivated to find [Enter field name] work. Let the conversation lead you wherever it takes. Be very polite. Say” thank you for your time, I’ll be looking forward to hearing back from you.” Rinse, repeat. This is to force them to be looking out for your application.
When you get to the interview, shake their hand firmly, tell them your first and last name.
Describe your experiences as “ two years transcription and data entry” if you have a desk job interview and “ [however many years] costumer service, retail and stock” for your retail jobs.
Don’t use job “ buzz words” I stg they hear them all day. Say things like, “ I’m detail oriented and am very good at taking instruction.” “ I would like to work for a company with integrity and I feel that [ company name] would be a good fit”
When they ask you if you have “reliable transportation” say YES. don’t tell them what kind of transportation, just say yes. (if you don’t do this, you wont get the job , I’m telling you right now).
Research the company. Know what they do, why they do it, how OLD the company is. WHERE it was founded, and what kind of position you’re intending to apply for.
When they ask you “ give us a situation where you had to blah blah blah” Make one the fuck up. Make yourself sound good as hell, and like you put your company’s needs slightly above the customer’s needs, but make the customer happy.
If they ask you about being outgoing, Say you “like to focus on your work so you can concentrate on doing things right” (which buys you out of having to act friendly all the time)
Questions for after the interview:
1. Does this position offer upward mobility?
2. Do you enjoy working for the company? (if you’re not interviewing for a temp agency who will send you anywhere)
Then, shake their hand, Ask them to repeat their name (REMEMBER THIS) say thank you for your time, wish them a nice day and leave. write their name down outside if you have to, just remember the fuck out of it.
AFTER your interview, send a card directed to the name of the person who interviewed you (I’ll give you them) that says “Thank you for the interview, I appreciate the opportunity. have a great day” This shows that you have an understanding of professionalism, and will have them thinking of you kindly (or at least remembering you) when they’re shuffling through the choices.
DO NOT tell them you just moved to the city over the phone. In person, tell them you just moved to the city. Make it sound like the only reason you need a job is because you moved. Not because you’re desperate.
__________
The titles of each section are key words you can use to search for jobs on Snagajob.com and Simplyhired.
please don’t call one day after you submit your application.
please wait 1-2 weeks before contacting a company about your application.
^^^ Most job postings even say “No calls please” for this very reason. If you’ve ever worked in an office setting, you know HR is busy af and has more to worry about than your particular application.
I only ever call if I’ve interviewed either over the phone or in person and they told me I’d hear back by a certain day and I haven’t heard back from them.
By the time you’re in that position, they’re interested in you (at least a lil bit) and you’re not just a other pest. Plus, you’ll probably have the recruiter’s direct line rather than just calling the receptionist who has know clue who you are, what you’re talking about, and probably gets tons of calls like yours every day, all day.
You are Superman, aren’t you? Lois, look, we’ve been through these hallucinations of yours before. Can’t you see what you almost did? Throwing yourself off a building 30 stories high? Can’t you see what a tragic mistake you almost made? I made a mistake? I made a mistake because I risked my life instead of yours. Lois! Don’t be insane! And don’t fall down ‘cause you’re just going to have to get up again! Superman II: The Richard Donner Cut (2006)
This scene features one of the best things about Chris Reeve’s portrayal, which is that he physicalized his different choices between playing Clark and Superman. Like, look at the difference:
He could go from Rick Moranis to Chris Evans with just his posture. It’s like his glasses are weighing his entire body down. Here it is, in motion:
Acting.
This is a perfect example that proves that the Clark Kent disguise actually does work….and how it works….
Christopher Reeve was the best Superman and still is
Are we gonna discuss that Lois Lane rationalized that Superman wouldn’t even feel a bullet, thus wouldn’t even know he hadn’t been hit, causing Clark Kent to reveal himself for who he truly is without her having to risk anybodies life?
“For the past 30 years Republicans have used racist dog-whistle politics to convince people, especially white people, to vote to dismantle the exact things that they most depend on for health, safety and security. They’ve used racism to convince white people to starve public education, and to starve the social safety net. So in fact, racism is economic suicide for most white people.” – Tarso Luís Ramos: How the politics of racial resentment backfires on white people
“They’ve used racism to convince white people to starve public education, and to starve the social safety net.”
people have no idea what its like to be 14 and have everyone telling you that you’re faking and pretending to be ill for attention or to skip art class and the doctor’s telling you you’re ‘just being a teenager’ when you actually had a serious kidney disease
if someone hadn’t eventually listened to me i would have died
Please, please support self-diagnosed teenagers, don’t pretend they’re not really disabled, don’t belittle or mock them, don’t exclude them from disabled spaces and for the love of god don’t pretend you know more about them than they do
i am disabled to this day because when i was a teenage girl, my doctors didn’t take me seriously. when i said i was in extreme pain, they said i just wasn’t trying hard enough at physical therapy to repair a broken ankle. turns out they’d fucked up the surgery to fix it, and their neglect of my months of complaints meant it was damaged beyond repair. i still have mobility issues 8 years later, will have pain and require surgeries throughout my life and will, always, be disabled. because of them. because of the silencing of girls’ voices, in all spheres. because doctors do not value the voices of teenaged girls.
When I was twelve, the knee specialist I had finally convinced my mom to take me to (after years of begging) told me that my knees hurt because of my hips widening.
“No,” I said. “You don’t understand. I can’t walk when it happens, it hurts so bad. It’s been since I was a little kid.”
“It might twinge a bit, sure,” he told me. “Go to physical therapy for a few weeks.” I burst into tears.
My mom then refused to take me to physical therapy, because it was a long drive and the doctor said it wasn’t serious, so why should she bother? That was the start of her not listening to any complaint about my joints I ever had.
As it turns out, my knees were dislocating every couple of days. She and my doctors ignored and taught me to ignore sprains, fractures, cartilage tears, and dislocations until I moved out and learned that it wasn’t normal. I missed out on years of my life because of my doctor not only discounting the experience of a young girl, but fully blaming my pain on the fact of my being a young girl.
Listen to children when they tell you something is wrong with their bodies.
I had stomach pains for years as a kid. Almost daily. I was blamed as a faker.
I have Celiac.
People know what the hell is going on with their own bodies. If they don’t think something is right fucking listen to them.
In their study, “The Girl Who Cried Pain: A Bias Against Women in the Treatment of Pain,” researchers Diane E. Hoffmann and Anita J. Tarzian documented the degree to which girl’s and women’s pain is routinely dismissed as the “not real,” “emotional,” response of “fragile” females. Not only are girls and women who experience pain less likely to be taken seriously when they describe it, but they are less likely to be treated by medical professionals.
people always talk about edgy 13 year olds saying they have a mental illness to look cool as if that started with tumblr but like.. they’ve always done that…… they’ve literally always done shit like that. and overall increased access to mental health resources is an overwhelmingly good thing. plus if someone’s pretending to have an illness for attention they could probably use those resources anyways
the idea of the “teenager who lies about mental illness for attention” is essentially entirely a myth. i’m absolutely aware there are kids who say they have schizophrenia when they don’t, but i think them doing that is a lot more complicated than “they want to look cool online”. it’s often them recognizing the onset of mental illness of some kind and processing it through the only lens they have, which is media portrayals.
and behaviour like that CAN often be a “cry for attention”, but that’s something that needs to be taken seriously. people discredit a lot of things young people do (especially self destructive behaviours or self harm itself) as being something they’re just doing for attention, but that’s ridiculous because someone being in a situation where they need help enough they’re willing to hurt themselves to get it IS a real problem. attention seeking behaviour is a symptom.
Thread on colonization leading to changes in diets and more health problems, and white vegan moral arguments.
A conversation I had with some twink a few weeks ago about how if moralizing is the reason for his veganism why he drew the line at the treatment of animals and not the destabilizing effects of stealing staplea from indigenous people and the treatment of brown workers.
Help Me Improve My Art 