ive been reading a book that basically explains how so-called “brain differences” between the genders is the result of gendered socialization and not the cause of it. i honestly expected the book to be very cis-centric but its actually the opposite, the author stresses that testimony from trans ppl is actually indispensable because we’ve, in a sense, “lived both experiences”
more cis feminists should have this mindset
one of the first examples that she uses to introduce her point about how perception by others can shape a person’s performance actually uses a trans woman. it explains that as a certain trans woman became to be seen as a woman more and more frequently, the ppl arond her eventually started viewing her as being ill equipped for tasks that they did not bother her about pre-transition. eventually she even found herself underperforming in these tasks herself.
I knew it was this book before I’d finished reading the first two lines. Honestly this book is indispensible if you want to debunk any gender determinism people claim is science. I can’t recommend it enough.
(Bonus bonus: I am myself a neuroscientist, and the old white men mentioned above – who are not – could not have missed the point harder if they’d actively tried. Which. Maybe?)
I’m all for not sticking to strict gender roles but the main
issue I have with Tumblr Softboy Culture is the idea that being unmasculine
makes you a morally better person, when in reality it doesn’t.
what i find funny about it is that men did this in the 70s when they were Sensitive Hippies and in the 00s when they were Metrosexual and In Touch With Their Feelings and all these men still ended up abusing women, they just coated it differently. my father was a Sensitive Anti-Masculine Hippie who knew that Men Can Cry and yet that didn’t stop him from creating an emotionally, financially and verbally abusive and controlling environment for his wife and his two kids, who are all in therapy and permanently damaged. it’s not new and it’s still just as insidious.
Almost like abuse isn’t inherently tied to masculine behavior and just has to do with being a shitty person.
at first, after the contestant minh thu professed her love for the other contestant truc nhu, they walked out of the show together:
but apparently afterwards, the bachelor quoc trung met up with truc nhu and convinced her to remain on the show, which pretty much broke hearts everywhere:
BUT i just found out that minh thu and truc nhu are officially together as a couple!!!
you could be my boyfriend of 85 years or my husband of 586778 years or my favourite teacher or my most beloved mentor but if you are a man and you yell at me or raise your voice at me i can 100% guarantee our relationship will never be the same ever again there is something so treacherous about men who needlessly raise their voice
Okay, but replace man with woman… Sounding a lil sexist.
why stop there!! let’s replace man with gecko!! i HATE reptiles!
😦
awww. i don’t mean you gecko girl it’s okay i’m sorry
In my personal experience, women raise their voices because they feel like they aren’t being listened to. Men raise their voices because they feel like they aren’t being obeyed.
People helping people. That’s all this world should be about cuz all we got is each other. Love seeing this kindness from big companies. Needs to happen more often in corporate America.
Okay but what company is that? We should support businesses doing good things
Pro tip: if an evangelical stranger approaches you asking to pray for you, there’s inevitably something about you that they see and want to change. [Ex: I attend a very conservative, very religious uni and am clearly tomboyish/lesbiany, and thus am constantly attracting evangelical strangers] If you can’t shake them (usually very difficult), then turn the tactic upon them by asking if they mind you leading the prayer bc “I have a few things on my mind.”
Then talk about whatever it is that’s making them uncomfortable. I ask god to protect all the lgbt+ kids that are lost, isolated or homeless. I mention my non-Christian brothers, sisters, and siblings that have to fight for recognition and respect in a monoreligious nation. I pray for the protection of immigrants and refugees, reminding my evangelical friends that their savoir was once one of that number. You can pray for pregnant mothers to find the resources and abortive care that they need, if they need it, if you’re feeling particularly brave.
This achieves two things: 1) there is no response to this, esp if you wrap it up with “amen, thank you guys so much for doing that with me. I hope y’all have a blessed day” and leave them no room to continue the prayer. But more importantly 2) that group will NEVER bother you again and you will show them, using their own method against them, that their prayer isn’t an act of faith, but of power.
Just thought I’d share bc I know that I used to be accosted by evangelical strangers once a week on my uni campus and never had a good response or ‘out’. This is by far the most effective method of shutting that sort of behavior down real quick.
Jesus could be a passive-aggressive son of a G and this is right out of his playbook.
Help Me Improve My Art 